its been a while...

Soooo... I was on my facebook, and noticed the link that I had coming to this blog and realized I hadn't written in it for damn near 8 months! So... we are immediately putting an end to this...

As an update to my life---

That marketing job I was working--- DONE!  I finally quit that damn job!  I had had enough of those harassing assholes!!!  

I'm now working a PT job, and pursuing comedy full time!!!

Recently got back from San Diego--- did a show at this spot called Moondoggies... yes i know crazy name... but it was a blast... the headliner ended up canceling so myself followed by Yoursie Thomas held down the show!  

I've been auditioning for some things--- they are in the works-- and when i know a final decision on them, ill be sure to update here---- until then.....

Payin For Compliments

I've already given you a full recap of my feelings towards the holidays this year and the people that try to donate you to death.. see "Freakin A Man" ...however, you've gotta love the Salvation Army bell ringer guys...

Every morning when I get to work, I usually go across the street to Wal-greens to grab a Vitamin Water and a snack for the middle of the day.... this year, a nice man, about my age, maybe a few years older, was there ringing the bell with pride! I immediately duck my head to prevent eye contact, but it was inevitable. As I get closer, my heels clicking into the asphalt, this guy starts making this sound... "mmm mmm mmm" when I looked up he said "good morning beautiful"... i smiled, was a bit embarrassed, and kept walkin my happy ass into the Wal-Greens... Knowing that he wasn't going to stay quiet on my way out, I kept my left over change from my purchase in my hand ready so that I could make a deposit into his bucket and then maybe the embarassment would stop...but no.. i put the change in.. he strikes up convo with me... askign me where I had gotten my shoes, and that he loved the sweater I had on... Politely i tried to end the conversation and walk away, but the compliments kept coming... and after a while.. i kept listening and chatting, while at the same time digging into my purse to find extra change... it took me getting to the bottom of my bag with no change to realize ... Damn.. am I really PAYING for compliments from a broke ass bell ringer, how do I know this dude isn't gonna empty the pail for himself!... this shit is pathetic!

Just thought i'd share:)

Being Star-Struck In BED!

Living in LA you're bound to bump into celebrities now and then... me, myself, I perform stand-up comedy at every chance I get and I attend as many shows as I can, so I run into celebrities quite often. Usually, I don't recognize them at all, even when they are introduced to me... It's bad I know, but on TV they look different... and you don't think you'll ever see them out in public! They're supposed to hide (LOL)

For example I met that Payton Pantierre girl that's in a million commercials and I think plays in Hero... had NO IDEA who she was...until i saw her in a commercial when i got home...

Met Chris Spencer, only knew of him through my mentor, David Arnold, and next thing you know I'm watchin' Snoops Fatherhood and here's his ass performing!

Another time, I met Kevin Hart, and as horrible as this sounds, as I should be on my comedy game and know big timers like him, I had no clue who he was or that he was as "famous" as he is... I literally sat beside him at the Laugh Factory in Hollywood and discussed comedy, things I liked, what I wanted... like he was some "Average Joe" tryin' to make it in the game (and by the way I admire his humbleness and genuine personality) To my surprise... he was a somebody and a BIG somebody.. well little somebody ;) haha but you know what I mean... i got home and I'm laying in bed and all of the sudden there he is on my TV.... so I instantly jumped on IMDb and searched him... to my surprise, here come the credits... "Along Came Polly" ...this man was just sitting by me... He was in "40 year old virgin"!...i was just speaking to him...the list goes on and on...meanwhile, my eyes are going back and forth between the tv and the computer... then i start remembering the stupid jokes I made... oh and not to mention the critique my big mouth gave him... wow.. im an idiot... but I WAS JUST SITTING NEXT TO HIM... and all of the sudden... there you have it... STAR STRUCK IN BED!

FREAKIN' A MAN

Such a "white phrase" but Christmas is making me say it this year! OK... so i know this is going to be cold and harsh but damn it.. I'm sayin it anyways! I'm so sick of these damn people at checkouts asking me if I want to donate my money to some charity, organization, whatever! NO! I think it's pretty safe to say, we're all strugglin financially right now, and I hate to admit it, but my ass is stingy with my money.. i don't want to give you a dollar to donate to this or that! I'm just not that nice.. sorry...

I love Christmas, but I swear it's become the most opportune time to guilt people out of money... I'm not fallin for it!

Just my opinion.

Guys Are Like Superheros...

My newest theory on men:

They are like superheros,they can crush all your dreams in one solid leap and bound! Let me explain...

I've been dating recently and what I've learned is not to get your hopes up about shit... it's best to go into it thinking it's going to be hell and then being pleasantly surprised by the nice guys.
I had a crush on this guy, we had talked every now and then, but usually through text, and one night he asked if i was free for Thursday of that week and set up a date. We had planned to make dinner together and kick back with some movies. He even reassured me the night prior that we were still on... only to call me the next day... saying he had "personal shit" to take care of... then proceeded not to talk to me for over 2 weeks.. then when he did talk to me he was a jerk, mind you he had asked me out! Then there is guy #2, he's the one that we had an awesome date, but then freaked out, he said he didn't want to keep seeing me b/c he liked me too much... What the fuck??? Guy #3, he's just crazy... this guy is the one that I met when I was having drinks with a friend, was very sweet, we went on a few dates, then he became very weird... everything had to be planned perfectly. Now, he's calling me every freakin minute talking about how he supposedly missed me (WE ONLY HAD 3 DATES!) and how much he wanted to see me again... PSYCHO, can we say Fatal Attraction

The moral of the story...don't invest hoping and dreaming into a man... b/c as i said.. they're like superheros and will crush them with one leap and bound.. as soon as you think one is a good one, inevitably they will fuck that perception up... it's just gonna happen... the trick is discovering their kryptonyt.

On Another Note...
What is it with guys that you USED to date thinkin they can still get the ass? Just because you had it once before, doesn't mean we're going to circum to your new found charm. I dated this guy for 4 years on and off... and we've been broken up for over 3 years now. However, we talk now and then, and for some reason, he thinks he can say things he used to say and its gonna make everything ok, turn me on, and make me want him...what is that?
News flash ass hole, when you cheat and impregnate a woman multiple times, it kinda puts you out of my dating pool of quality men. I'm not interested in your banter about what you remember us doing, nor am I the least bit entertained by you telling me that you want me so much and you miss me and love me... BULL SHIT! haha!

Just sharing my latest thoughts on the opposite sex.. chime in if you wish:)

"Chitlin Circuit"

Ok ... no lie... I am on ITUNES radio... and there is seriously a station called "Chitlin Circuit"... not only was I a bit shocked by this name, but seriously how do chitlins and music relate AT ALL... they claim by the station name that it's the origination of blues and r&b... I'm sorry, but pigs intestines is not the origination of smooth sultry sounds like Brian McKnight, R.Kelly, Neyo, 112, Voices of Theory, Jagged Edge, Usher or any other R&B artist.. Just had to share that with ya'll!

Adult Temper-tantrums

This topic is one I've wanted to touch on for quite some time... Growing up, supposedly you're supposed to be taught things like communication skills, social skills, and basically all other necessary skills required to live in the real world. However, I find that I encounter more and more individuals who's skill set is far from complete.

Since when is it OK for adults to throw temper-tantrums? I thinks its safe to say that the "real world" is just high school with more serious issues, like taxes and insurance. However, I thought once you grew out of the taking bath stage of life, temper-tantrums would then follow in suit and cease... Not the case at all. Between colleagues, acquaintances, and various other people, I've seen an increase in "adult temper-tantrums" in the last month. Maybe it's due to a bad economy, bad relationships, who knows... but seriously... it's a bit ridiculous...

I want to ask these individuals.. who the hell told you it was OK to act like this? I mean really... since when is it OK for a grown ass adult to throw a fit over petty shit...and it's not just females.. it's guys too.. the minute you don't get your way, temper-tantrums. And they come in many forms- Most common, is the "blow up and act like everythings ok afterwards format" (demonstrations coming soon) Then there's the "Inaudible Screaming", "Ignore Til' It Goes Away", "Deprivation of Sex", and my favorite the "Fuck It, I'm Done"

If you're guilty of throwing any of these temper-tantrums... reconsider your life skills.. you may need to take Life 101 another time!